Paris-Pere Lachaise

Row of neo-gothic grave chapels, style of choice in the latter half of the 19th Century

Paris being a city of millions, it has as many stories to tell and each grave, chapel and statue on Pere Lachaise tells one. However, some stories stick out more than others. We won't go into that of the rather over-rated J. Morrison, (whose presence at P. Lachaise unfortunately attracts huge crowds of ill-mannered folks, but luckily for us, only when the weather is nice). Instead, we would like to direct your attention to the grave monument of the journalist Victor Noir who died in 1870. It's nice enough, though, to stroll about the cemetery and see all these monuments, great and small, intimate and and loud and observe how fortune fares after death. Tons of bronze, marble and other costly materials have been shaped by the best artists and artisans into ostentative memorials to people who were hugely rich and famous back in the day but all but forgotten today. Hic transit gloria mundi, dear guests of the blog, so memento mori...

Is she keeping the residents in or the intruders out?

Pere Lachaise was started in 1804 because a new burial ground was needed and new ideas about health hazards of cemeteries directed it out of the then city limits. It was placed so far from city centre that in the start it attracted few funerals, so the management thought of a shrewd marketing trick to lure in new punters. They brought in famous, but yet very dead people like Abelard and Heloise, Moliere and Lafontaine, which attracted other celebrities and the post-mortal celebrity groupy crowd alike. Today about 300.000 people lie buried there.

One of those really great guys who brought the world really great guns

It's almost impossible to overestimate the liveliness of the history of Paris during the 19th Century. Revolutions, restorations, wars, Haussmann reconstructing the whole city, social strive, technological and artistic innovations all had a huge impact on the city and its dwellers. Some of the major players in that history found their resting place on P. Lachaise, in or under monuments that they themselves or their folks saw as sufficiently becoming, in accordance with their state during life.

Statue of the journalist Victor Noir

There are many monuments who stand out from the run of the mill, neo-gothic chapel (which the Baskadiyarlar-team LOVE, don't get us wrong) and one of them is that of the journalist Victor Noir. Son of a humble artisan, jew-converted-to-catholic father, he became journalist for a Republican newspaper during the rule of Napoleon the 3rd. The editor of his newspaper got into conflict with the cousin of Napoleon, Pierre, and to make a long story short, Pierre Bonaparte shot Victor Noir. The pen might be mightier than the sword, it's not mightier than the six gun. Noir came to a rendeze vous with Bonaparte packing a piece himself, but he was supprised by the latter, and was killed. This was cause for huge indignation in Republican circles, which got worse after Pierre Bonaparte was acquitted by the court of law. Victor Noir was buried first at Neuilly cemetery but later transfered to Pere Lachaise, where he got this statue made by the sculptor Jules Dalou.

Victor Noir, who carried left and wore heels

Soon after the shooting of Noir, war with Prussia broke out which in the end brought the demise of the House of Bonaparte and lots of other things to worry about that obscured the death of a journalist. Not many people nowadays will know who was Victor Noir, and since Verdi didn't put the story into an opera, it couldn't have been all that important, right? For one, no lady was mentioned in this story. But the guy must have made an impression on ladies that lasts until today, because a remarkable cult formed around his grave.

Myth has it that placing a flower in the top hat after kissing the statue on the lips and rubbing its genital area will enhance fertility, bring a joyful sex life, or, in other versions, a husband within half a year. As a result of the legend, those particular parts of the green bronze statue are rather worn.

Grave monument for Oscar Wild

Oscar Wilde might have been open to a monument like the one built for Noir, with the eternal genital rubbing part and fertility cult, but look what the poor bastard got: some sorry assed, faux Neo-Babylonian piece of trash covered in lipstick. How ironic to reward the man who gave humanity such witty plays, novels and poetry with something this atrocious. He suffered a great deal during his last years, why must these pilgrims continue to disrespect him after death?

Real estate like this in any good Parisian arrondissement is quite unaffordable now.

Eugene Delacroix, painter of the 'Raft of the Medusa'

Jewish grave chapel

P. Lachaise is one of those few places in the world where one can find catholics and protestants, Chinese and Vietnamese, Jews and Arabs peacefully co-existing .

Cheap marble tenderness

Who they were, has been erased by time and rain but the intention remains.

Wasn't that door was closed when I looked at it a minute ago!?